Tuesday, June 3, 2014

failed sub girl

I visited Sir yesterday and he took care of me.
I call him a sadist but we have decided that he is not nasty.
Can you be a kind sadist? I think you can.

My mind was all over the place.
My thoughts were racing.
My thoughts were all over the place.
One thought here, one thought there.

I walked into the room,
I undressed.
I stood, hands behind my back, offering my breasts and body to him, handing the nipple clamps to him.
My nipples were clamped. He gathered up my bells on the clover clamps and clipped them hard to my slick cunt.

He spun me around, His fingers probing me.
As his fingers met the metal of the plug that I had inserted in my arse before I arrived.
His hot breath brushed my ear. His hand squeezed my throat.
"Good girl," His voice filled with pleasure that I had inserted His plug.

I didn't find my space yesterday. It eluded me. It cheated Sir.
He had me come hard. Strapped and retrained, toes tied by string to pulleys, chains and nipple clamps.
I was unable to relax into the pain, the discomfort.
I came at His will but soon I cried. I couldn't cope with a tenth of where He usually takes me.

He stopped.
I didnt ask but He read me.
He loosened the restraints.
He held me.
He massaged my entire body.
He took me to bed. I slept.
He took care of me.

This morning when I woke I felt ashamed, I had let Him down.
My sub self had let Him down.
"It's OK, it doesn't matter. I like to take care of my girl. Next time we are back on track." He said.

photographer unknown


  1. And of course you will. Sometimes the submission eludes us, but with the right Sir all will be well. Next time....

  2. First off, your Sir is awesome!! He didn't wait for you to safe word. He saw the emotional toll occurring and did what was needed for you. Your needs are priority. So not forget that!

    You did not fail! There are just times when our submission means letting Them take care of us that They feel is best. It's Their decision. I bet your Sir would feel even more served of you let go and let Him in.

    Doms, good ones, know what we need. We fail to see it, so They continue with what you feel is expected of Them until we submit and realize what we need They are waiting to give. He was waiting. I doubt He was surprised. In fact, I bet He was surprised how far He could take you until you truly submitted.

    1. first off, yes He is a bit of alright. I hven't used my safe word since the very first time we played, oh what a whimp I was for Him then. It was a good test though. I have never used the safe word though I am committed to using it when and if I need. I have come close, but He always stops just as am considering it. I think its because He reads me so well.

      The rest of your comment- how very wise you are Hs.

      xx L


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