I have paid little attention to the continuing saga of 30 days of submission, i get a little bored with it..so here is number 7
Do you accept and/or expect discipline or punishments as a part of your submission? How do you feel about it?
Hmmm. I hate punishment. I always try so hard and it feels unjust to be punished. Discipline is fun. Punishment just makes me try to avoid punishment. In honesty, I respond better to praise..try harder. I need to please. I have not experienced much I would label as punishment.
Once I remember being so incensed by a punishment it almost split me away from the Dom man. It was early in our discovery of each other and it was probably far too early for such a severe punishment. He did not know me. He misjudged me. I did not have the level of trust to accept his decision without question. I was not truly submitting. In fact I have not ever truly submitted if I am honest. Not completely. It comes back to trust doesn't it. I want and need to submit, but I have never so deeply trusted someone that I can submit without reservation...naughty me...does that deserve punishment? ;)
There in is my journey though..to learn to submit..to trust so deeply that I can submit.
All hail the imperfect novice submitter!