Sunday, March 18, 2012

a new course

I have been talking with him for a while. My first local man.  My partner has agreed, my non-Dom hub ..its been years coming, to let me explore my submission with another man. It is huge for him and me. There is much trepidation on my part.

I want need and crave exploration, but as desperate as I am to be taken in hand in real life by a Dom man I am equally as desperate not to adversely effect my primary relationship. This is the main reason, the only reason I have moved so slowly with a real life experience.

Strange feelings, anxiety. As life aligns itself for our first meeting. Just a meeting. A quiet drink. There is no going back.

He has been patient, my brat has emerged.. again the anxiety. Just jump I hear my self-talk say. Why is this so hard for me? What am I really scared about? I know myself. Once its done I will wonder why I fussed so much.

artist unknown via tumblr (and Daddy xx)

2 comments:

  1. I can understand you feeling anxiety and being scared but I think once you meet him, you will feel very comfortable following his lead. Good luck in having a very satisfying relationship for both of you. And I hope you keep us up to date on your journey in the lifestyle.

    FD

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. oh thank you FD, i know you are right..you always are! :)
      L xx

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