A newer connection is taking up some time.
I have been careful to not make connections that have any chance of becoming a threat to my 'real' offline relationship. While I wait for my love to discover me, to come on this journey with me, to lead me, the need in me grows exponentially. The ache becomes a need. Time ticks slowly when that need is not fed. So in weakness I allow another to take me on a journey and what an interesting journey it is! There's those 'hell's bell's' moments...what the *&%#@ am I getting myself into? But its like a car crash where I can't look away.