Friday, November 5, 2010

The style of submission I choose

So much is happening, it remains confusing at times. My husband enjoys the blogs I have led him too, (my own blog though remains a secret from own private Idaho!). Like a switch flicked, he is beginning to understand my journey and he is starting to follow a path that is pleasing to both of us. This journey together might be nice.

I have played online with wonderful men and one has walked into my vision that now I can't get out of my head. I wonder, thinking of my secret self that the author of 'A Dominant Character' spoke of, and a concept that I have not been entirely unfamiliar with, I wonder if my secret self will stay secret for very much long. Secret and anonymous.

There is only a few blogs here which I read, not because I am not interested in anyone else but simply due to the restrictions of time. I follow a few blogs written by 'Dom's' the risk of incorrectly labelling these wonderful men who share their thoughts. I have been thinking lately about who I am with reference to labels. David, in A View from the Top, poses a question about the type and quality of submission a woman chooses. He offered a precis on current discussions regarding three styles of submission; passive, active and aggressive. David suggested that to be passive in submission, the traditional idea of submission, could lead a woman to becoming lost with regard to her own desire and creativity and become a purely passive recipient of her Masters attention and command. At least this was my interpretation. I felt my feminist rise and throw her head back (steady girl). To be actively submissive, I interpreted, is to be active in the titillation of your Dom/ Master/ Sir...(and so many other labels). Finally, aggressive submission requires some show of force by the Dominant partner. The submissive she must be overwhelmed by their strength and superiority.

As a novice in this bright, shiny and wondrously delicious world of submission and Domination, I find these arguments describe the subtlest and greyest of differentials. When applied to myself, I see me in each of these descriptions and each of them in me. In the end each of these styles of submission will be defined and agreed inside the relationship between a man and his girl.

Returning to my feminist self; I love her..this feminist she. As a liberated woman I have the power to choose...and I choose to submit. I have a freedom in that power, I am happy and released in the power of consentual submission or consentual non-consent.


  1. well put, I think you are coming into your own in this lifestyle and am not sure novice is a label that still applies.

  2. thank you Sir J,

    I appreciate your observation (and your visit), however I feel very much like a novice...I continue to have difficulties with submission and this is why I think all styles of submission suit me. The lack of an ever present Dom in my life, makes my submission incomplete. But I am nothing if not patient. Drip drip drip!..I will win out in the end.

    L x


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